


Animalistic Tendencies

by shatteredplates



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Dork Dib (Invader Zim), Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 17:03:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20763869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shatteredplates/pseuds/shatteredplates
Summary: Just some random Zim headcanons shoved into a messy fic...Or, a bunch of situations where Zim shows off that he is Not Human™





	Animalistic Tendencies

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written in months so sorry if it sucks ;w;

Zim was certainly an odd creature, sure he was _ decent _ at acting human most of the time, but his little chirps and purrs when in private would always surprise Dib. The more he spent time with the alien the more things he noticed about him that were more… inhuman than he expected. And he was always prodding around to learn more about humans.

The first time he noticed it was the first time he had spent the night at Zim's base.

* * *

They were settling in for the night, and Dib was laying on the couch while Zim changed. (Another surprise to Dib… Zim wore different clothes!) He had assumed that Zim would sleep down in the underground base, but nope, just as Dib was about to fall asleep, he felt some rustling at his feet and a sudden weight crawling up his side. 

When he looked down, Zim was staring straight at him, frozen, in the middle of crawling up to his torso.

"Uh, Zim? What are you doing?"

Zim looked panicked for a moment, realizing that this probably wasn't a normal human thing, before regaining his composure and resuming his climbing. "Nothing that concerns _ YOU _Dib-beast!!"

Dib sighed and settled on watching whatever the small alien had planned.

Once he made it to dibs torso, he forced him flat on his back and began curling up on his chest--much like a dog or cat would.

Dib let out a low chuckle, resting his hand on Zims back, letting his fingers trail up and down his thin frame.

* * *

The second notable time was when Zim had gotten curious about 'human mating rituals'

* * *

"And what is this 'key-sing' you humans do??" Zim tilted his head a bit, leaning back on the arm of his sofa.

Dib's cheeks and ears turned a light pink, not exactly excited to explain these kinds of things to Zim, even if they were dating now, (or, as Zim liked to call them, mates). 

"Well, eh, for starters, it's called _ kissing _. And um.. it's when two people, uh," he stumbled, "put their lips together. It's supposed to feel good."

Zim thought for a moment, opening his mouth a few times as if he had something to say but quickly thought better of it.

He leaned forward a bit towards Dib, taking another moment to think of what he wanted to say. 

"Show Zim."

Dib grew a bit frantic, "are uh, you sure? You might not like it, actually, you _ probably _ won't like it…"

He rolled his eyes, "I said, show Zim!"

_ Well, here goes nothing… _

He leaned over to the irken, slowly pressing their lips together, careful to make sure Zim could pull away at any time. Surprisingly, he did not, even letting out a small purr until Dib leaned back, red in the face.

"So, uh… that's kissing…" he looked away, embarrassed.

Zim looked down, then up at Dib, who was looking everywhere_ but _ Zim, "That was… satisfactory… er, well, Zim liked it."

They sat in an uncomfortable silence for a moment, before Dib broke it with an equally awkward question, "So… how do irkens show affection?"

Zim looked sad for a moment, but quickly shook himself out of it in order to give Dib an explanation.

"Irkens are not made for _ affection, _ Dib."

"Oh…"

"But- uh- many, many, generations ago when we still mated, we, ah… My Tallests, what has gotten into me! I am ZIM! I'll just show you!"

He grabbed Dib by the shoulders, pulling him forward, and gently licked the human's cheek with his serpentine tongue.

Dib was a bit taken aback by the surprising roughness of it. He expected it to be smooth, but instead, it was more like a cat's, rough and sandpaper-y.

The irken quickly pulled back, blushing a deep fushia.

"Eh, well! That's it! Don't look at me!" He shrieked, wrapping his arms around his face.

Dib couldn't argue, he wasn't super fond of the idea of eye contact either.

* * *

Dib had also found that Zim had a strange fascination with the inner workings of humans, namely the heart.

* * *

They were hanging out at Dib's house this time, cooped up in his room as to not disturb Gaz, and so that Zim could comfortably take off his disguise. 

They were sitting at his desk, watching something mindless about the paranormal. Dib would occasionally point out strings and plot holes while he stroked his alien's scalp, who was curled up in his lap, leaning into his chest. 

After one particularly fake video, Zim began adjusting himself in the human's lap, pushing the base of his left antennae into Dib's chest.

"Whatcha doin' there, Spaceboy?"

Zim stayed silent, putting a hand up to signal Dib to be quiet. 

He sighed, starting leaning back in his chair and wait for Zim to finish up whatever he was doing when the alien let out a small chirping sound.

"Uh, Zim? What was that?"

Zim put a claw over Dib's mouth, looking a little agitated.

Dib rolled his eyes, pushing the irkens claw away, "If you tell me what the hell you're doing I'll be quiet, okay?"

"I'm listening to your life box! It's unusually slow!" He paused a moment, "Oh! It's speeding back up now, good!"

* * *

So, Zim definitely wasn't normal… but neither was Dib, so did it really matter?

**Author's Note:**

> A note before you comment! (Which I hope you will do!)  
Don't try and start any discourse in the comments! Anti zadr shit will be deleted!
> 
> Tee hee I have a Tumblr... @posesdramatically


End file.
